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Life Balance Wheel and Test

candle with glassware on table

Here is an assessment to see how balanced your life is.

Most assessments will separate spirituality. But did you know the Hawaiians believe that there is no church, no place of worship, because spirituality is woven into every part of your life. If instead, you look at your life as six parts, instead of seven, then spirituality can be added to all of them.

Take the test to see how balanced your life is!

If you would like to make a change in your life, and incorporate your spirituality, through tangible goals, into every part of your life, sign up for 8 weekly sessions to change your life for the better!

Click to check out spiritual counseling and life coaching.

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Clairsentience, What is it?

Feeling Life and Psychic Definitions of Empathy

Like a prima ballerina
I tip toe, tip toe around you constantly
I hear the water running
Will it wash your tears or leak through the ceiling?
Make my way up a spiral staircase
Hope to God you had a good day

When you’re furious
When you start to freeze
When you can’t be touched
I feel everything
And when you despair
When you cannot breathe
When you wouldn’t dare
I feel everything
When you’re in ecstasy
But you’re not with me
I feel everything

Idina Menzel is singing my theme song. I woke up this morning with another hand print on my chest. It’s bigger than mine and the thumb angle demonstrates that it couldn’t be from my own hand, unless I can dislocate my wrist, leave my hand in one place long enough to make an impression, and put it back, all while being unconscious. Since we moved into our new house, it’s actually pretty rare that this happens. We have been here six years, and the most common physical phenomenon that I have is my skin getting flushed or having random scratches down my back or thighs (that are painless and last only an hour or so before disappearing).

What is clairsentience? I feel things. I’m an extreme case, but I figured I would start a series of blog posts about the different psychic abilities and what they are actually like. Instead of talking in theory from people who don’t experience them, or have copied what other people have said since the 1930s, we will talk from a very real point of view. Starting with my sensitivities, let’s begin a series of posts describing exactly what these abilities are like. When we get to the abilities that are not like mine, I will consult students who do experience them.

An Empath is a wash of two areas. An empath is a clean mix of claircognizance and clairsentience, and then sticking with mostly those two. Claircognizance is “knowing things” when there is no experience or access to that knowledge by tangible means. Clairsentience is “feeling and experiencing things” with no access by tangible means. An empath is someone who understands what someone is going through, has the divine ability to say the right things, is generally someone people dump their emotions on, and are taken advantage of for their overly-sensitive ability to nurture. To be clear, empaths UNDERSTAND the EMOTIONAL state of others.

The gift of Clairsentience is even more psychic in nature. Clairsentients can feel what other people are feeling and take this into their body. They can also receive information about the person’s sense of self and why it is there. A clairsentient is wrongly defined as an empath. Instead of empathizing and understanding other people’s emotions, we quite literally experience them. When I’m connected to someone, I can feel their grief, confusion, fear, deceit, motivation, lethargy, and much more. I also feel the physical anomalies of a person’s state. What the heck does that mean? I feel what others feel that are not their every day to day feeling. Here are some examples.

As I’ve said in previous posts, I was a performing arts teacher. When I coach people in singing, I can feel where their tongue is in their mouth, or how they’re using their soft palate, or where their pharynx is, and give instruction to help correct those things. In dance, I can feel which muscle they are (or are not) using in order to execute a movement. I can even feel if they are dehydrated, iron deficient, having difficulty with allergies, or lacking sleep. It’s like a layer of clothing on my own body pulling, activating, relaxing, or tensing. My mouth goes dry when I’m around other sensitives. My skin telegraphs a rash when a group of people are emotionally flushed, frustrated, or rash. And in extreme connections, stigmata.

Stigmata is generally associated with devout Roman Catholics, exorcism, and the Holy Communion. I am not, however, any form of Christian. Stigmata is the phenomena of spontaneous bloody wounds that mysteriously open up. Mine are relatively small. A random cut in the same place that someone else is also cut. There are specific things that must be in alignment in order to for this to happen. I have to be genuinely connected psychically to the person as a clairsentient . We must exchange a large flow of natural energy. Most people are naturally blocked as vulnerability of any sort is scary. So the person I’m connected to must not have that natural block. I have to be in a state of ‘openness,’ (in other words, I’m reading them). Then they get cut. As I’ve said, clairsentients will demonstrate physical replications of other people from a psychic connection, as well as emotional, spiritual, and even sexual. In other words, stigmata is rare, in and of itself, and those of us who have the misfortune to sometimes have it, we also experience it few and far between. They may be been stigmatic their whole life and not known it. “How did I cut myself? Where did that come from? Oh, well, I’m such a klutz. HAHA. I don’t even know how I hurt myself. haha.”

Clairsentience can be confused with emotional disorders, however. Having a wide range of unexplained emotions can be a chemical imbalance. The difference is this: You are feeling another person’s emotions! Make sure that if you are not actually connected to another person and are feeling a range of emotions without causation, to speak to a health professional.

Clairsentient Struggles:

Not knowing what your emotions are vs the emotions of others’. I struggled with this greatly as a kid. My mother did her best to help by placing me on Sam-E, St. John’s Wart, Kava, Evening Primrose, Omega-3s, vitamin Bs, and the like. For years, this was helpful to dampen the confusion of emotion, along with citrus aroma therapy. It wasn’t until I was in my early 20s that I stopped taking these and was able to better identify the self. I think this was easier in my early twenties because the synapses in our brains to understand time, novelty, and self aren’t finished forming until about 24, anyway. So how do we help other kids with this dilemma when they don’t have those synapses formed and they are struggling with differentiating between their own emotions and the input from other people? They feel other kids’ depression and so we think they are depressed. They then feel another person’s ecstasy or joy and we think they are manic. Does the child have bi-polar or are they clairsentient?

The answer only lies with exact science. They must be connected psychically, even by accident or without their care yet (as kids have a difficult time controlling what they are connected to or reading), to someone who is demonstrating the same response. Also, it is best that they are not aware of the other person (put them in separate rooms). Otherwise, there may be another psychological disorder in the clusterB family, attempting to mimic the other person. Once you have repeated evidence of this, you can pretty much conclude clairsentience. Trial and error. Collect the data. And collect lots of data.

Once you’ve determined that you’re clairsentient and without psychological obstacles, there are some things you should know: You’ll have difficulty with war, major tragedy (even if you don’t see it or know its happening), group hatred, and others’ loneliness. When the war on race happened in 2020 with the country wide riots in the United States, I was devastated for weeks.

Watch out for other people’s loneliness. I will say loneliness is the worst feeling to feel from another person. It’s at the top worst feeling connections. I don’t like feeling other people’s hunger because I find it confusing. I genuinely have a difficult time differentiating between mine and if I’m feeling someone else’s.

Clairsentients can increase their abilities in order to differentiate between themselves and others, making them hyper aware of who they are and who they aren’t. They’ll be reactive to people telling them how they are feeling or who they are or what they think, as they know solidly these things about themselves. We don’t appreciate anyone defining us since we must constantly look at our definitions of self in order to have peace of mind.

Another thing: they can feel plants get cut down and the screams of trees in agony. They can be distracted by the heightened hormones of teenagers or other heightened emotional responses. They can find people because they understand energetic signatures (after they’ve been connected to them). Do all clairsentients do all these things? No. But they are all in the family of ‘experiencing.’

Forever consciousness puts it in a lovely way: “In fact, if you are able to detect “energy” in a space, even when no one is around, or detect energy from a person even when they are not displaying emotions, it is most likely that you are clarisentient and not just empathic. 

These sensations may manifest as:

  • Feeling what another person is feeling even if they are not displaying emotions
  • Feeling heavy when you walk into a room or meet someone
  • Feeling anxiety for no reason when in a space or around a person
  • Sensing when those around you have pent up emotions
  • Experiencing a sudden change in mood
  • Sensing the presence of another being before you see them
  • Feeling uncomfortable in crowded spaces
  • Feeling pressure around your head or a headachey feeling

Once Empaths and Clairsentients alike have worked out how to manage their gifts and protect their energy from negative experiences, they can truly achieve a lot.

They need lots of sleep. They need lots of self-care. They need time with themselves away from others to unplug and clean the channel. Even then, being alone may not be enough. Clairsentients who are also mediums feel spirits, guides, and other non-corporal entities as well. This takes extra care and protection around the home for a safe space to rejuvenate (speaking form experience).

My husband calls me a ‘sensor.’ Someone you can quite literally see “a change in” from an outside element. It can be great because you’re moved to help people have a sense of belonging since you understand exactly what they feel. It can be terrifying because you feel things that might be ugly, terrifying, or off of your ethical compass and you don’t know what to do about it.

An offshoot of clairsentience if clairtangence, which will be my next post on the “CLAIRS.”

I’m happy to give people peace of mind. I’m happy with this gift (among my others), and how they shape my experience of the world around me. Although I am also claircognizant, my blend does not make me strictly an empath. As Idina Menzel sings in her solo album, “I Feel Everything:”

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What Spirits Live Beyond?

art fingers foggy hand

Glendower. – I can call spirits from the vasty deep.

Hotspur. – Why, so can I; or so can any man:

But will they come when you do call for them ?

(1 Henry IV, 3.1)

There is no secret that the Christian church has put all the spirits that reside beyond the veil fit into two categories: evil and holy. But what if there is more of a sliding scale? What if there are more? Well, there are. So here is a pretty comprehensive list collected for you.

Ghost: A human who has died who has not passed on to the veil. They have a tendency to be in a trance and difficult to talk to the living. They need to pass on to the other side of the veil, and with help of a medium who is also a spiritual guide, they can do this.

Spirit: Well, this is used in several ways. 1) A human who has died and has passed through the veil. 2) The all encompassing word for everything spiritual that touches us.

Shadowperson: You’re only scared because you don’t know what they are or why they are there. There are a couple of theories. One is that they are of another dimension or time that has overlapped (quantum woolly masters, anyone?). Either way, you may be a shadowperson to them as well! Another is that it’s a non-corporal critter that is just curious. They don’t want to harm you, and any feelings of that you’ve just put on yourself. It’s literally in your head.

Djinn: A non-corporal critter that is created neither good nor evil. They are their own species and generally create relationships with people, items, or places, for which they aim to please. This urge to please their attachment then nudges them towards ethical or unethical (whatever that means).

Fetch: A non-corporal entity made from the energy of a human (yep) and is tethered to a body made out of natural materials.

Servitor: A non-corporal entity made from the energy of a human(again, yes) and is not tethered to anyone or anything. These are usually made out of the rage or trauma of a person and then create havoc. They can be created with great focus, but need a lot of energy to create. These are mistaken for as demons. They are actually a version of psychic attack that take an energetic form and purpose. They can cause physical harm.

Toyol: Un-dead infant spirit of South East Asia. They lives inside items and are attached to those items by a shaman who has taken the infant spirit from the veil and placed it in an object instead. They steal things but are very much like a cranky child and hard to keep happy.

Psychopomp (Collectors): Escort creatures (spirits) that recently died. They are wispy and generally hide in shadows. They are black and hooded and have no face. Because of pop-culture and horror movies, we are taught to be afraid of them. They don’t “bring death” nor are they a bad omen. You’re alive and seeing them? They aren’t looking for you. They are to collect the dead spirits, or other entities that belong on the other side of the veil and bring them back. It’s cool that you’ve seen one, but not dangerous for you at all. In fact, mediums like myself call on them to help bring stubborn ghosts and spirits back to the other side.

Poltergeist: A ghost, or person who has died and not passed to the veil, where the spirit has mutated at death because of rage, hate, vengeance. These entities mutate from human form into lights and tendrils of currents and energy, and cause physical danger to people because of the ability to move objects. Their psychic energy is so intense that these guys have telekinesis and can mess with the frequencies of radios and electric currents.

Obake: These ghosts, or person who has died on who HAS NOT passed on to the veil, where the spirit has mutated at death because of sadness, woe, and depression. These entities mutate from human form into small black fuzz and soot. They are dangerous to humans as their lethargy and weight is contagious, quite literally covering them in heaviness of soot and despair.

Spirit Guide: Generally a humanoid spirit companion, however that isn’t necessarily the case, as an intellectual, emotional, and spiritual guardian. Some ancestor spirits chose to become guides instead of reincarnating. Spirit guides come in many forms. Some from nature (like tree spirits, or from the waterfall), some from ancestors, some from the guardian plane, animal guides or totems, aumakua, and some from other categories of the spiritual. This is more of a job title than a genus.

Bogart: This is a boogeyman. It has been around FOREVER in every place around the world! They will put their clammy hands on your face while you sleep, they are cause dogs to be lame, they say uncouth things, ugly, bestial attributes, and give bad dreams. The good news is this: They have no body and they just want to move into your house and cause havoc.  They are hard to get rid of and like to attach to people, by harassing them.  They pretend to be demons because they know you are afraid. They don’t want to be ‘in’ you or take over your soul, but they’ll say it to upset you.  Their purpose is to feed off of ectoplasmic fear (NOM NOM).  Creating a happy place and ignoring them will make them go elsewhere, just stay strong! Other names: Sack man, Boogeyman, El coco, a cucca, babua, butzeman (check out Wikipedia!)

Demon: ½ human, ½ beast, but upright. Generally appear to have too many fingers or none, no bones or skin, have a number of heads, talons, wings, hooves. They like homes, are aggressive, and like chaos, and messy places. They have no body and wish to use a living creature as a shell, but will settle, in some cases, to reside in an object that has a lot of living emotional energy attached to it. They will only (and I mean ONLY) seek those who have unbalanced lives, holes in their soul, and live as a mess. Remember, if a person is complete, then the house is full. Like a hermit crab, it needs a place that isn’t totally occupied. Then it will do what it can to live in it. Extraction is painful for both the host and the demon.

Dybbuk: Like a demon, they are a possessing or parasitic spirit. They leave their host body once its goal is accomplished (whatever that is). Each dybbuk may have a unique ‘goal.’ Learning this helps with extraction, otherwise, both may die in the process.

Incubus & Succubus: An incubus is a bogart in male form who, according to mythological and legendary traditions, lies upon sleeping women in order to engage in sexual activity with them. Its female counterpart is a succubus. Salacious tales of incubi and succubi have been told for many centuries in traditional societies. Some traditions hold that repeated sexual activity with an incubus or succubus may result in the deterioration of health, mental state, or even death.

Angel: Humanoid with bird wings. It’s a human messenger. Angels engage in destroying creatures unlike themselves by their definition, very similar to people in the idea of ‘justice.’

Garuda: Bird-kite-man of Hindu, Buddhist, and Jain.  Protector and can go swiftly anywhere. This could be another culture’s angel. Same critter, different name.

Kinnara: Hindu. Plays music. Part human, horse, bird and watches over humans. This could also be another culture’s angel. Same critter, different name.

Mothman: Looks like a shadowperson with large black wings, red eyes, humanoid. They are doom deliverer (bad stuff is coming. Our 2020 spirit animal?). It’s not there to harm you, directly. Its more of a foreshadowing.


Pukwudgie: Like a goblin but has no body (maybe its actually a boggart?).  Best left alone.  If annoyed, lures people to death or creates fires and likes to put sand in people’s eyes.

Kami: Japanese elements of landscape, forces of nature, as well as beings that express a singular expression.

Tengu: Japanese, human form, white hair, red face, Bird-like, lives in mountain peaks, and is a spirit of the arrogant dead. They tempt weak people away from Buddha with false images, seductions, and easy-workless life. They are basically a nasty critter that is faking being an angel. Tempter. Remember, real angels don’t tempt or make promises.

Vodyanoi: Russian water demon and never leaves where he is.  It comes out when a body is ready for burial if drowned where is home is. That’s pretty specific, so not a lot to worry about.

Yuki-Onna: Japanese irresistible woman in all white, pale, and has cold breath. She eats souls and they freeze to death… through the mouth.

Kishi: An Angola attractive man. He has a second face hidden behind long hair. He also eats people.

Gwyllion: She is an old woman that lives in the mountains. She also eats lost humans

Akvan: Persian demon of unlimited powers and strength.  It has fangs, horns, appears to wear a skirt. It spread lies and enjoys destruction, but does the exact opposite of what it’s asked. Might be another name for a Dybbuk.

Gamayun: Bird with woman’s face that spreads divine knowledge & prophecies.

Kalavinka: Asian creature with a human head, bird torso, blowing tail, sings about the divine words of the Dharma.

Later we will talk about Water, Land, Fire, and Air elementals.

I hope you enjoyed this!

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Graveyard dirt and where to get it

Please don’t steal from someone’s house.

Please don’t go to the closest cemetery and offer something and then take their home, a magical ingredient needed for so many things.

Truth is, spirits can be mad, just like people, and can be vengeful. They will want justice for taking part of their place of peace. Imagine someone taking from your house. How would you feel about that? Angry? Vulnerable? Vengeful? Well, now imagine if you had the flexibility and fluidity of being spirit.

A student of mine had a recent problem. He did leave offerings both at the gate and at the plot of dirt of a cemetery and everything seemed find. He left whiskey, candy, coins, and tobaccoat a Jewish cemetery. He went home and had been having minor inconveniences left and right even small scratches on his nose.

“Should I give back the dirt or toss it out, I don’t think these people like me cause I’m not one of them,” he said.

I told him to give to back. My thoughts are that he probably left the wrong offerings. Jewish people don’t leave anything that decomposes as grave offerings. So no food, no flowers or other plant matter. Also, the probably would prefer to not be used and then dismissed.

What annoys me is that my student had asked a lot of experienced witches to make sure he did all the right steps, who all told him that if he did not have permission to take the dirt the spirits would have made it abundantly clear to him in that very moment and they didn’t. He even kneeled down and asked. But spirit isn’t a parlor trick. They’re at rest. A relationship must be cultivated and understood between both parties, and patience.

One of my lovely students wrote to him: “I think unfortunately people in a lot of witch groups have an unfortunate tendency to assume that they will be stopped if they did something wrong. But that’s honestly just assuming that there’s far more order in our world than there is. I think it’s another form of the good things happen to good people fallacy. Some people are just jerks. Some spirits are just jerks. You unfortunately got a jerk. I personally would return the grave dirt and take back the offerings the spirit didn’t like, apologize, and not work with that one in particular any further. There’s a Japanese tradition to rub sea salt on your back before leaving an area where there are angry spirits so the spirit doesn’t follow you any further. I would do that as well.”

Here is the reality about life and getting what we need. We shouldn’t just take. And we must be patient when we ask, because the answer can be no, and we must respect that. But we must be patient. Most of all, it is audacious to assume the answer would be yes from a singular chance meeting. Walk up to a stone’s house and ask for a chair in exchange for a gift. This request to take of their land is just as audacious. But if your nice came to your home with a gift in exchange for a chair that she needs, for which will better her life? Well, she will probably get her chair.

Even spirits don’t have to like us, right?

I don’t necessarily like every person I come across.

Think about the living. We have our own prejudices and our own preferences when it comes to people. So… simply go to a different ‘club.’ We don’t belong in every circle and we don’t make friends everywhere we go. This cemetery is just not for you.

Also, the signs from spirit aren’t necessarily shown right away. AND build the relationship with the rested before taking the very first time. In some cases, you may not be allowed to take from a site.

In Hawaii, all of the land is a burial. You can NEVER take lava rock as it is part of Pele’s body, life, and the resting place of her mortal body. Many have taken the land, wanting a token or a souvenir of their vacation, but this little rock is part of her resting place, her home, and her body. Wouldn’t you be upset if someone took one of your knuckles?

The great Goddess Pele will literally kill you slowly with bad luck and misfortune until you’re hit by a bus or something. She is a God, which the spirits at rest are generally, not; however, spirits have the ability to do the some major damage, especially in a group.

Cemeteries are like book clubs… not all of them are welcoming. Find a different cemetery. Maybe one that speaks to you culturally. Maybe one that just feel comforting. One that you can feel the peace. You are taking part of someone’s home, so shouldn’t you feel welcome in their home, too? Trial and error. Return the dirt, leave the gifts as a “thanks for seeing me anyway” and move on to another book club.